Trista is from New Jersey. She's also a girl. That does not make her a Jersey Girl. Nor does it make her a character from Clerks. It does, however, make her occasionally say words different from you. That's okay, she thinks you say some words different from her. Sometimes this has nothing to do with New Jersey.

Trista is not a funny person. Sometimes, she tricks people into thinking she's funny. It originated in high school, when she once used up all her ideas in writing something funny. After that, she had to trick people into thinking she was funny. In 1995, she tricked Heckler's Online into thinking she was funny. They found out their mistake several months later, but kept her around for another three years to be not funny.

However, Trista likes funny things. She thinks the Marx Brothers, Buster Keaton, Peter Sellers, Roberto Benigni, Trey Parker & Matt Stone, Liam Lynch & Matt Crocco, Jon Stewart, and David Letterman are all funny - not in that order. She thinks Kids in the Hall are funny. She thinks Moonlighting is funny. She finds many other people and things funny. She likes the Mets. She doesn't think they're funny. Other people do. The night before writing this, she read Kurt Vonnegut's Breakfast of Champions. She thinks that book is funny. "This is a very bad bio you're writing," she said. "I know," she said. And so on.